Saturday, February 9, 2008

The Backslider

A Girl Raped in Dagupan

A girl went to a party and she ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away. As she walked along under the tall elm trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he was waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely. The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story. The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her." Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone. Did you know that 98% of teenagers will not stand up for God? Repost this as A GIRL RAPED IN (your city) if you truly believe in God. PS: God is always there in your heart and loves you no matter what "If you deny me in front of your friends, I shall deny you in front of my Father"

STAND UP FOR HIM

93% wont repost this

Lets raise this number.

I love God

***
I have read this in the friendster bulletin a while back and I was moved by the thought of the message. I swear, it had touched me so much that it made me cry. It's a chain message (obviously) but I didn't mind because it's the message that I'm after for. I have a soft heart when it comes to things like these you know. Haha. Yeah right. Sorry about that again. Btw, Hannah, a schoolmate in grade school posted it.

Deep, deep sigh. I hate it like this but my memories suddenly comes back..

I was 7 or 8 years old back then when I became a born-again Christian, a very active one. Because I was living with my relatives who were active Christians too, I became deeply involved in Church activities and so at a meager age, I accepted God and slowly, not so long after, my life revolved inside the Church and with God.

I was in 5th grade when I transferred in a Christian school (FYI: I use to transfer schools at lot) and that's the point in my life where I felt closest to God. The foundation of my Christianity grew stronger and stronger. Later, my faith became indestructible, or so I thought.

Looking and comparing myself before and the present, I can say that I am a completely changed person. (Everybody changes right?) What I am now is a whole lot different from my life when I was younger. As a matter of fact, I couldn’t imagine myself now being a downright religious person talking to God everywhere, reading the Bible constantly and memorizing verses on my way home like I was before. Yeah, let me repeat that again, like I was before. LOL. It's nothing really. I just know that these days, that's kinda weird to imagine. Now I am wondering if my classmates back in grade school think I was...weird. Haha. I really think they did. Oh yes, how can I forget? How can I not remember them bullying me after our Wednesday devotions in school, calling me "Banal" and stuffs. (You know who you are. Haha)

With all of that, I could say that I was living an almost perfect Christian living. But that was before.

When my parents got separated, I told God and myself that if He will send a miracle for my Mom and Dad to reconcile, I'll offer my life to Him forever. I was so serious about it that I prayed for it every single night before I sleep, every Wednesdays of our Devotion in school and every Sundays in Church. I prayed hard that they'll be together and we'll have a happy family again and I never failed to include that in my prayers. I have never missed to pray about my Mom and Dad, about our family.

But after 2 years, I gave up. I lost my faith and turned my back to God or in the Christian term, I backslide. A lot of trials and problems came to test my faith and I failed to win over them.

Yes, I loss and now, I am lost. I lost my direction in life. I lost my faith in God. I lost...myself.

But despite all of these, I know that God has never forsaken me all these years. He never did to anyone. I know he has His reasons why he didn't answer my prayer about Mom and Dad. In the right time, eventually, I'll know why.

God has always been there for me. I know in my heart that He’s just waiting for me to come back home but...I think I’m not ready yet. It's been like 10 years since I turned back my faith so it’s not that easy on my part to turn back as well to the mistakes I’ve done and all the wrong decisions that I’ve made. (Oh gosh, it's hard to explain but i do hope you got my point.) A lot of things had happen in the past that I cannot change anymore. It's complicated but I know He'll understand.

I'm not yet prepared and I need more time to think things over.

I just hope it’s not yet too late when that time comes…

24 comments:

Anonymous said...

heya apple! the story was awesome! i truly believed that when you have faith and believe, it will come be true!

Anonymous said...

born again din ako :) you know what, maybe He has a reason why He let your parents go on their separate ways. oh i should now, my parents are separated too. but like, maybe they are not meant for each other. and maybe He has plans for each of them. yenoe. He won't give us challenges naman that we can't get over with. He loves us and He won't leave us alone. Maybe for now, ask Him for peace in your heart and understanding, so you can understand what his plans is/was :)

Emzkie said...

thats a good story Apple! I was moved too after reading it. I think the lesson of that story is never to walk alone at night. lol. and not to walk to an alley. hehehe..
by the way! I got you tagged!! its in this LINK <-- happy weekend to you!

Apple said...

Thanks patty, cindy and ms emz for the comments :D

Anonymous said...

i know, im wonderin too. but then again, im doing fine right now, right? like i know it sucks for me and my 2 siblings that they got seperated but see, im still blessed. eventho im a sucky person. and bcoz of that, im thinking, what more could i ask for yenoe.

oh no problem :)

Anonymous said...

i know. haha oh i dunno. auko kc ng emo entries. hahaha. so pag nallungkot ako, hndi ako nagbblog. hndi nman ako plagi msaya. mahilig lang ako magjoke.

Ishna Probinsyana said...

Hey Apple! The story you posted is really worth reading and reflecting for. :)

And yeah, everything happens for a reason. Take care!

Ishna Probinsyana said...

no biggie! i love leaving comments on my friends' blogs! (Haha, i'm assuming we're friends, online friends that is!)

Thanks for leaving comments on my entries too. :)

Farah Deen said...

wow! i am touched reading this entry. it makes my goosebumps stand and i feel like crying too.

yes, whatever religion you are, you have to know that God is there, whenever you need him. The only problem is that, we are never there to call out and reach for God, though he's always there to protect us. Awesome story apple.

about you loosing faith in God..well dear, sometimes, we are not lucky enough to get everything we want. sometimes, God test us with the toughest and most cruel test in life, but that doesn't mean that God has abandoned us or leave us to crawl our lives. Have faith, and believe in God. Abt your parents, destiny brought them together, and destiny and situation broke them apart. wont worry dear, i am sure you will be rewarded by God for all the tests you've gone thru. be brave, be tough and be a good girl ok?

Misha said...

aw~ I dint know U had a sad past. But u know what, I think ure a strong person overall. :) And just don't look at it as a negative thing.. at least it made U the person u are today diba?

And besides.. I was bullied too when i was in high school. I kept crying everyday and hope I would just disappear. I'd even hurt myself thinking they'll feel guilty of what they're doing to me. I know..it sounds pathetic ryt?? But I was young.. I dint have any direction. Lost talaga.

But it made me stronger. And guess what, those people who bullied me.. they look WAY pathetic ryt now. Their lives are trash. I swear.. akala nila umiikot lang ang mundo sa high school. Babaw no?

So you should be happy girl.. at least U are the person U are today. Yung sis ko.. yung mahal ko.. :)

Misha said...

Of cors, sis kita e. And I mean it.. and besides were not the only one who was bullied during childhood. I used to watch 'Tyra' before. Sabi niya na-bully din siya.. Naomi Campbell became her biggest nemesis. And to think naging idol niya pa yun. But she was so mean to her that she even wanted to quit modeling. But look at her now..

Si Naomi sabog kahihithit.. pero si Tyra well admired. :) What goes around comes around nga diba?!

Ishna Probinsyana said...

Yeheey! Ilove having new friends, blessing kase yun diba? :) And yeaaah, let's comment and comment and comment! :P

Stay strong dear! God loves you, God loves us. :)

Anonymous said...

hey sweeetums ~ thanks for visiting my site & sure id lvoe to link ex =] *teehee* tc & god bless <3

Anonymous said...

yes, i updated. i felt like i just couldnt shuttap about it. i was so mad at him. have u seen the 2nd video? underweight c jennylyn tpos hndi manlang sha makagHI sknia. tpos sabi ni jennylyn ILL JUST WAIT FOR HIM blah blah blah. pgtpos nia ganunin c jennylyn iiwan. badtrip. hndi nman ako mshado FC. lol. and oh no, believe me, i suck at writing. i suck at english altogether =) and yes, we are meant to be sisters. preho tyo ng pinagddaanan at kinaadikan (aka blogging).

and yes, kindly ship me some ube hopia please =( thankshoo vair much!!!

Anonymous said...

I have read this before and it never failed to give me goosebumps every time I read, particular the ending. I dont know why

Anonymous said...

Trust in Him with all your heart, all else will follow.

*HUG*

Anonymous said...

aww.. i know how it feels when He does not answer our prayers, but i know that He loves us and will never leave us.. just trust and believe in Him.. ayt?? :) tcee!!

Cez said...

the story is indeed great! ang ganda. and it's true naman na He's always there, guiding us.

.cez

Rocks said...

Apple,

I know how you feel because I was once a backslider. I know how it is to be lost..and I know it's not easy. Oftentimes you think you are happy but then when you are alone you'll realize you're not..and I know I needed God.

I just really hope it won't be too late my dear. I guess God still speaks to you, that entry alone proves that He still speaks to you.

You can never go wrong when you choose to respond to HIM and I know you knew that in your heart!

God bless you!

Anonymous said...

Sis, dito na ako reply ha. Yung commentluv plugin na nasa site ko, pang wordpress lang sya. Di ako sure kung may mga ganyang plugin na pwde iinstall sa blogspot

Bhem-Hime said...

with God, There is no "too late"

Kahit kelan hindi Siya mapapagod na maghintay, that someday babalik ka sa Kanya. :)

God bless.!

Anonymous said...

ay thanks =D i know right? we havent been comment exchanging for quite awhile now. kasi nman, someone here ain't updating. and that aint me. LOL. jk lang. tama yan, matulog ka, hndi puro net inaatupag. LOL. jk lang ulet. missed you. advance happy hearts day =D

superym said...

super powerful talaga si Papa God.
He wouldn't let us down as long as we have a strong faith in Him.
nice...

konoha_shinobi said...

hello ! care to exchange links??
just let me know when you already added me to your links so i will link you up to mine!
http://dayday.blogsome.com
good day!